A study carried out at Queen’s University in Kingston, Canada suggested that an average person has 6200 thoughts per day.
Now…if there’s something you should know about me (that’s not on the about me page)…is that I am an overthinker (raise your hands with me if you’re also the same). So I feel like I triple the amount of average thoughts from that study.
As I’m going through this career change, it’s really hard for me not to always think about “Why haven’t I found a new job yet?” or “Is this career change really right for me?” or “Why am I not where I want to be?” or “I feel like I’m wasting so much time at my current job. Should I just quit?” and the list of thoughts go on and on. And when I have those thoughts, I get really stressed out because I start to criticize myself for not being smart enough or hard working enough. I get into this negative cycle of thinking where I get stressed more and then I think more negatively, which leads to more stress. This actually happens to me frequently but last week was just like peak stress and negative thinking. After journaling about it and listening to some a Dr. Joe Espinosa podcast about the human mind over this past weekend, I realized that I can and need to control more of what thoughts enter, leave, and stay in my mind.
Today, I tried to put that into action. Whenever I caught myself wishing I was at a new job writing software, I immediately stopped what I was doing, acknowledged the thought, and then said to myself: “Focus on the task at hand. Focusing on wishing you were at another job will not help you finish your work.” At first, I felt relieved because I felt like I had control over my stress. I felt more present and focused. And then like 5 minutes later, the thought came up again. Again, I acknowledged the thought and the way I was feeling and tried to refocus my attention and awareness to my work. I was doing this constantly…it was hard and quite tiring…my focus was shifting back and forth. I was fighting the temptation to be distracted or to focus on the negative thoughts. And it wasn’t just at work. As I was taking my software classes, I was thinking about how I wasn’t getting any interviews. I started doubting whether or not I should continue learning software. I had to take a small break to break away from my thoughts.
I know these were just small examples, but as I’m ending my day with this blog, I feel less stressed compared to what I was going through last week. I feel more present and almost like “free” because I temporarily broke a behavior or habit. Like I’m not chained to certain negative repeating thoughts. The thoughts that I did put into and leave in my head like “Focus on doing a good job.” or “I’m grateful that I can be part time and take classes” or “Let’s focus on learning a new subject” really made a difference in terms of keeping a positive attitude on the task at hand. It’s definitely not easy trying to control which of the 6200 thoughts come into your mind, but I feel like when you are able to, it makes a difference in terms of the energy you have for living your life in the present moment.